Self-Submitted from the Husband

I just got done sharing with the Husband that I started this blog back up again. He actually almost choked from laughing so hard when he saw this post.

And then I just got an email from him titled "For your collection" with this picture

How bad can you feel for him when he's submitting his own work?!

Toilet Paper Goes Weeeeeeee!

Toilet paper is a recurring theme around married(ish) roommates. Just see this and this. And now see this:

I'm trying to imagine what has to happen in someone's head for the toilet paper to get this outta control.

Who Needs a Smoke Detector?

Clearly eliminating the annoying beeping, interrupting the husband's reading and relaxing during his three-week vacation, caused by the battery going out of the smoke alarm, is more important than our safety.

And holy crap! This is a pattern. While going thru the archives, I found a similar post from 10/14/2010. My grandfather would be appalled!

Paper Towel Double Whammy.

This one just makes me laugh. And it's a double whammy.

First- who would ever need that little bit of paper towel?
Second- it's clear the roll is at the end.

If the husband had simply replaced it, this photographic evidence would have never existed!

PS- Paper towel etiquette has been a recurring issue in the Fast household.

Why use a Trashcan when you have a Counter?

I mean. Really. Why put anything in the trashcan when the counter is so much bigger? And apparently easier to access?

Why step on the thingy to open up the lid and put anything inside?

Why?

History in the making here and here.

Yogurt Lid

Hours after the husband consumed his yogurt, I walked into the kitchen and found the lid mere inches away from the trash. I'll never understand the logic of stuff like this...

Wetsuit Storage

My husband, a surfer, rarely knows what to do with his wetsuit when he returns from a hard day of surfing (which usually happens while I'm working). But it's common for me to walk into the bathroom and find his wetsuit balled up in a pile in the tub. I don't know how he expects it to not smell or ever get dry. Usually I end up wiping up the pile of sand he's schlepped into the apartment and then come up with a better solution to hang the wetsuit for maximum drying potential. (I'll post a picture of that concoction the next time the wetsuit comes out to play).

Paper Towels

Back by popular demand...

I've been hesitant to post on this here blog only because I myself haven't been the perfect roommate. But, I guess in the end, that hasn't really stopped me, now has it?

I can't tell you when this was taken...I just know it was a few months ago. And I've been holding onto this gem. I mean...honestly. This is nasty. Please, in the future, dear husband of mine, just throw that nasty paper towel out instead of leaving it on the roll.

Clean the f'n counter!

I imagine this being covered completely with ants when I'm gone on my two-week vacation. I may need to have my twin visit to see what the place looks like when I'm not even in the country!

Dehydration

Why is refilling the water one of the most difficult tasks for my husband to do?

I woke up this morning to find the nearly empty water pitcher thingy perched atop the counter a mere few inches away from the sink.

This is not uncommon. It's just usually still inSIDE the fridge. So this is a step in the right direction. I guess.

Who Cares About Safety?!

Apparently not my husband!

I found this on the table last night. I gave him until this morning to see if he'd put it back up to ensure my safety in our home- which is where I also work.

No such luck.

Boxer Short Alley

Sometimes shoe alley gets overridden by boxer short alley.

Distance to hamper? Five steps east.

Emptying the Dishwasher

From Joan in Chicago: So, my husband does the dishes if I cook, and vice versa. Yesterday, I cooked. Really cooked, not some frozen pizza. Well, he unloaded the dishwasher and instead of putting the dishes away, he thought they would be just fine on the table. I suppose it makes setting the table easier? Notice the dishwasher is right behind the table. Suspicious. The cabinet it at least nine steps away.

Molly's Note: I love that the husband doesn't put dishes away as if he was a maid or visitor who doesn't know where the dishes belong! Classic.

Garbage

We have a deal. I clean, basically everything in our home, and the husband is responsible for taking out the trash and brushing the dog. And yet, both need to be done with reminders. (I promise I don't suck to live with!).

While I appreciate my husband taking out the trash, is it really too much to ask for him to replace the trash bag and put the liner back into the trash can?

Gnarly Meat

What was I doing when my husband placed HIS gnarly meat on MY plate?

Cleaning the dishes from the dinner I had just made!

Very Dirty Dish

This is what happens when my husband cooks.

Q-Tips...

NEVER belong on the table you eat on. EVER.

Frozen Fries

Maybe I should be worried that my husband keeps putting items that belong in the freezer in the fridge? You may remember the ice cream cake incident?

At any rate, I of course snapped this picture as soon as I saw where he put the bag of frozen french fries.

Wetsuit

The wetsuit is like my third roommate during the summer. And while I'm working hard all day long, my husband is out surfing, then comes home, hangs his wetsuit in the shower and then takes a very long nap.

For the record, it's not fun to take a shower with a wetsuit. It's already tight quarters in there!

And don't even get me started on the sand...(in the shower, all throughout the apartment, in my bed!)

Coffee or Tea?

My husband likes coffee in the morning and tea in the afternoon. And he really likes to not clean up after preparing either drink!